黑塞好像是第一个让我真正引起对作家本人而不是作品本身巨大关注的作家本真而深入的表达让他的文字与思想互融互通他是多么丰富、多么矛盾而又圆融的人啊听着他说的话仿佛说出了我自己无法表达尽致的思考周围的环境逐渐smell like human institution宝宝腿趴开一点就不会疼的原因这些年也削弱了听见很多东西的能力整个人stop feeling certain shocks n pains当然我没办法否认不是自己故意的他说生命只有爱才有意义但是我已经不这么认为了其实唯有痛苦才是生命的真谛
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I imagined that this would be the happiest time in my life, but the calm here is not what I dreamt of. One after another, the days come. Aways the same, bringing nothing. Is this the will of God? Is my future just a dark corridor with a bolted door at the end?